& Dance Diffuser

"How to start at the beginning, if things happen before to happen?"
Clarice Lispector, "The hour of the star"

Lispector’s words resonate with me about the suddenness of things happening on our lives, before we are getting prepared for them, and the consistency of this fact for most of the important things I lived. I keep saying to myself that to allow the uncontrolled to step into my life is allowing oneself to move with it finding harmony in each collision. It is dwelling in the fusion of such chaos. After all, control is an utopia. Since I left Brazil in 2019, I’ve been experiencing an endless learning process of living in Germany, which my Brazilian roots traverses each aspect of this adaptation. It is a daily dynamic. It is resilience. It is being led by the unknown. There were so many unwished reasons to leave Brazil which were not lesser than my desire to stay. This work approaches the utmost feeling of being maladjusted in between two cultures, questioning the sense of belongness(less) and what it means to transgress the polarisation of here and there.

This performance lecture was premiered on 14.04.23 at Kulturhaus Dock4, Kassel-GE in the Festival Tanzhaus Temporär Nº4 "The Outsider's Perspective" from Tanzwerk*Kassel.